Pam
08-01-2001, 01:36 PM
We have all learned to live with "voice mail" as a
necessary part of modern life. But have you
wondered, "What if God decided to install voice
mail? Imagine praying and hearing this:
Thank you for calling the Father's House. Please
select one of the following options:
Press 1 for Requests
Press 2 for Thanksgiving
Press 3 for Complaints
Press 4 for All Other Inquiries
What if God used the familiar excuse..."I'm sorry,
all of our angels are busy helping other believers
right now....However, your prayer is very important to
us and will be answered in the order it was received,
so please stay on the line."
Can you imagine getting these kinds of responses as
you call God in prayer:
If you would like to speak to:
Gabriel, press 1
For Michael, press 2
For a directory of other Angels, press 3
If you would like to hear Kind David sing a Psalm
while you are holding, please press 4
To find out if a loved one has been assigned to Heaven,
press 5; Enter His or her Social Security number, then
press the # key (if you get a negative response, try area
code 666).
For reservations at "My Father's House" please enter
J-O-H-N followed by 3-1-6.
For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the
age of the earth And where Noah's Ark is, please wait
until you arrive here.
Our computers show that you have already prayed once
today. Please hang up and try again tomorrow.
This office is closed for the weekend to observe a religious
holiday. Please pray again Monday after 9:30 am.
If you need emergency assistance when this office is closed,
please contact your local pastor.
necessary part of modern life. But have you
wondered, "What if God decided to install voice
mail? Imagine praying and hearing this:
Thank you for calling the Father's House. Please
select one of the following options:
Press 1 for Requests
Press 2 for Thanksgiving
Press 3 for Complaints
Press 4 for All Other Inquiries
What if God used the familiar excuse..."I'm sorry,
all of our angels are busy helping other believers
right now....However, your prayer is very important to
us and will be answered in the order it was received,
so please stay on the line."
Can you imagine getting these kinds of responses as
you call God in prayer:
If you would like to speak to:
Gabriel, press 1
For Michael, press 2
For a directory of other Angels, press 3
If you would like to hear Kind David sing a Psalm
while you are holding, please press 4
To find out if a loved one has been assigned to Heaven,
press 5; Enter His or her Social Security number, then
press the # key (if you get a negative response, try area
code 666).
For reservations at "My Father's House" please enter
J-O-H-N followed by 3-1-6.
For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the
age of the earth And where Noah's Ark is, please wait
until you arrive here.
Our computers show that you have already prayed once
today. Please hang up and try again tomorrow.
This office is closed for the weekend to observe a religious
holiday. Please pray again Monday after 9:30 am.
If you need emergency assistance when this office is closed,
please contact your local pastor.